Archive for Professors
Man These People Are Serious (Telebears VI: MCB)
In the world of cutthroat, do-or-die Berkeley academics, nothing comes close to the savage ferocity with which MCB students pennypinch their points, looking for every possible opportunity to better themselves in the race for Hopkins or Michigan or whatever. We don’t even understand the joke in the picture above. Way too crazy and anal-retentive, those [...]
Leon Litwack Won’t Take None of Your Shit.
Leon Litwack, a professor of history at Cal, and winner of the 2007 Golden Apple, will be retiring at the end of the semester. His “ideal last lecture” is tomorrow night at 6:30. Anyone who keeps on getting applause from stingy Berkeley students must’ve done something right. It was another standing ovation for Professor Leon [...]
Disturbing is this Move by the Chancellor
We discussed it a few weeks ago, but some new developments have arisen. Student investigations by StopBP-Berkeley have revealed a significant list of appendices that were omitted from public view. This comes after the Chancellor publicly admitted that this was a completely open endeavor. Among other things, the appendices list names and resumes of faculty [...]
Our Parents Made Us Take These (Scheduling for Telebears, Part V–Pre-Meds)
We saved our last planning update of the week for the group that’s always obsessing and complaining over their GPAs/schedules/academics, the Pre-Med people. We know you people are probably going nutty trying to decide how taking these shitty requirements will make them feel. We know how’d it make us feel. Suicidal. Last time we took [...]
Not as Hardcore as EECS, but Hey, at Least We Have Lives (Scheduling for Telebears, Part IV–Engineering)
We go to movies. We club it at times. We still believe in dates. We were nerds in high school and your peers made fun of you for it. Now we’ll make more money than the rest of you losers. Who’s laughing now? We are engineers, baby. Chem 4A Richard Saykally, MWF 10-11, 100 Lewis [...]
Why is Scheme so Useless? (Scheduling for Telebears, Part III–EECS)
Programmers begin to be broken down in new ways by Lisp, then recover easily and dominate everything, leaving Cog Sci majors and people who hate programming (me) in the dust, only to be crushed by upper division projects. The EE people grow to hate the sight of computers and are ready to smash them by [...]
Wake up. Seriously, WAKE UP. (Scheduling for Telebears, Part II–Physics)
I used to think I wanted to be a physics major, but that was before I realized several things about college. (1) If you want to have fun with women consistently, you need to stay up later coddling them. (2) Physics classes are always scheduled between 8 and 11 am. (Unless you’re in one of [...]
Deciding on the Gun or Poision (Scheduling for Telebears, Part I–Math)
We’re not very happy with the incoming freshmen right now, because all the cool math classes we would have taken (Combinatorics, Mathematical Economics, History of Math) have been flat out cancelled to make way for extra lower-div math for apathetic engineers. Grad classes of course remain intact, so that leaves most juniors and seniors like [...]
