Archive for Religion
Mike Riley’s Special Visitor
MIKE RILEY: (after Oregon State scores the touchdown with under two minutes left) OOH, I LIKE OUR CHANCES. Proud of our bunch of boys. Two top ten teams down in a row. We just keep on crashing the party. Lyle Moveao: “We did it coach! 3-2 Baby, we rocking up the Pac-10!” Mike Riley: What [...]
Today’s Berkeley Crazie: The Prophet
You know, some people provide important messages to the Cal community, alerting us to the impending End of Times. Enter Yoshua, the man who will lead us all to the Promised Land. Yoshua stands for Hebrew for your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, the one true God. All shall bow before him and his overlord [...]
China Is Massing Its Armies As We Speak
Seriously. Look at these agitators. Can’t you see how they’re just training for a return of their Tibetan overlord? And of course those crazy Berkeley anti-establishment types just allow for this to go on. Ridiculous, we say, ridiculous. His Holiness the Dalai Lama’s Birthday Part 1 and Part 2 [YouTube]
The Lord Cannot Be Pleased With This
A week or so ago back in Berkeley, the progressive and spiritually enlightened Chris Hedges and the atheist “neo-con” Christopher Hitchens (yeah, you heard that right) squared off in your usual debate about the existence of God–and we’re not talking about the Flying Spaghetti Monster. We’ve seen Hitchens go head-to-head with Jon Stewart and Bill [...]
Jerry Falwell Died, But His Fatass Legacy Will Live Forever
What, were you expecting a eulogy? We’ll let the good Reverend speak for himself. On Sept. 11: “The abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked. And when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad. I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, [...]
There’s a Reason They Cancelled the OC
Well, that had to be the most innocent blurb for Jesus ever. If you blink, you’ll probably miss it, since the whole video seems to focus around the dopiest conflict ever. Has anyone other than Cory Matthews, broke up with a friend over getting a smart kid in the study group? However, Summer and Marissa [...]
And the Lesson is…God is SpongeBob?
As your thoughts move toward the inevitable finals, you must always resist the temptation of something terribly unethical, like, oh, leaning your head into someone else’s answers and somehow escaping the questioning glances of your watchful GSIs. Well never fear my friends, because God will be fighting within you through your travails. As this UC [...]
