Archive for Schedules
Want to Feel As Stress-Free As Possible? Easiest Classes This Semester, Part II
The semester is now closer than ever, and you’re probably scrambling around Telebears these last few weeks, filling up holes in your schedules with classes you probably will end up hating. Well, no worries. We’ll be happy to provide you with teachers who will be pushover…push you to your limits. Of your alarm clocks. If […]
Running Out of Options? Easiest Classes This Semester, Part I
(The semester is now closer than ever, and you’re probably scrambling around Telebears these last few weeks, filling up holes in your schedules with classes you probably will end up hating. Well, no worries. We’ll be happy to provide you with teachers who will be pushover…push you to your limits. Of your alarm clocks. If […]
Poll Smoking–Telebears XVIII, Sociology
For our last Telebears preview, we bring you the tough slog major that is…sociology. Sociology…isn’t this what all the Cal football/basketball players who couldn’t major in social welfare or family planning or mass comm. end up majoring in? Or the department where humorless feminists go to preach social change? Yeah. That’s what we think about […]
Studying Abroad Forever, Telebears XVII–Anthropology
Anthropology always seemed like an interesting, low-maintenance, and even somewhat relevant type of major that the geek inside all of us appreciates. You get to learn about people, about culture, travel to exotic locations, meet the remaining indigenous tribes on Earth. As long as you don’t mind all the skeleton interaction and aren’t a necrophiliac, […]
What are Ethics? Telebears XVI–Philosophy
Philosophers used to be beings of greatness, counselors of judgment, of right and wrong, the classical intellectual heroes. Now with science having rendered their contributions to society useless, they now throw out useless hypotheticals to each other, like “If you’re moving in a speeding car at 30 mph, and there are children playing in a […]
The French Care Only if They Pronounce The Words Properly, Telebears XV–Linguistics
The best way to start off the week is with a major no one ever thinks about when they enter college. Which is kinda sad, because we can’t imagine a cooler major to take for fun. Learn about random languages, phonetics, metaphor, imagery. It’s sort of like English, except less essays. Oh yeah, and you’ll […]
The Waitlists! They are Broken!
Just in case you’re uber-stressed about having to get into your Chem 3A 5 PM Lab, and you’re about, well, congrats chaps, your more fortunate friends are going to have to do it all over again! As far as we can tell, Telebears has crashed the classes you couldn’t get into. Cal Patriot and the […]
There? Their? Or They’re? Telebears XIV–English
English must be fun. Go to lecture, listen to absorbing thoughts about the most amazing texts ever written, write essays about those texts, and then have the professor/GSI knock you down because your interpretation doesn’t coincide with theirs. Must always be fun being an English major. Here’s what the students say about their fickle profs. […]
I’ll Really Wish I Had Majored in Econ: Telebears XIII–History
History is one of those subjects you try to avoid for the entirety of your time in school, simply because secondary school teachers like to ram into you many facts. Yes, that brutal bastard Christopher Columbus discovered American islands in 1492. Yes, Lewis and Clark teamed up with Sacagawea for the most successful threesome […]
You’ll Need More Than Hypnosis To Forget Your Grades (Telebears XII–Psychology)
Psychologists. All they need are comfortable sofas and a notepad to do their job effectively. If you manage to make it into this field, you are so set for life. You don’t even have to be very good, just nod your head, offer some vague advice, and then move onto next patient. Pretty decent way […]
