Archive for Professors
You’ll Need More Than Hypnosis To Forget Your Grades (Telebears XII–Psychology)
Psychologists. All they need are comfortable sofas and a notepad to do their job effectively. If you manage to make it into this field, you are so set for life. You don’t even have to be very good, just nod your head, offer some vague advice, and then move onto next patient. Pretty decent way […]
My Thought Bubbles Are Bigger Than Yours (Telebears XI–PEIS/Political Science)
Just from the gentle imagery and message you see to your left, you can tell politicians are some of the sweetest, most well-intentioned people you will ever meet. Sterling leaders of our great nation with their heart in the right place, they will always try to lead America to the Promised Land. Literally; we’re almost […]
Below the Mean (Telebears X–Statistics)
To end our week, we’ve decided to show a correlation between the amount of money we will make off this site (ads are up now) and how quickly we will lose our grasp of reality, which is now tenuous at best. Statistics people suffer from this problem all the time. See what they think of […]
Sell Your Soul (Telebears IX–Business)
Money. It’s how people in America judge how far off they are in the world. In order to compensate for their own lack of self-respect and self-worth, they make tons of this to provide solace and clothes to their families, only to cheat on their spouses with a stripper from Vegas Fargo a decade or […]
Dismal Science? How Come We Get Laid More? (Telebears VIII–Economics)
We think this graph above is as good a grasp of behaviorial economics as you need. But if you think otherwise, read on through the link to figure out which professor to learn your supply and demand from. (Have any memories about professors in this department for a class or in general? Contribute them in […]
Meet Your Future Zookeepers (Telebears VII-Integrative Bio)
The less-reputed cousin of MCB, IB majors take a great deal of pride (or is it alcohol?) in their work. Besides, who wouldn’t want to get the opportunity to work with cute little cuddly bears like our buddy Knut above? We’d ask them more about how much they enjoy their major, but we’re going to […]
Man These People Are Serious (Telebears VI: MCB)
In the world of cutthroat, do-or-die Berkeley academics, nothing comes close to the savage ferocity with which MCB students pennypinch their points, looking for every possible opportunity to better themselves in the race for Hopkins or Michigan or whatever. We don’t even understand the joke in the picture above. Way too crazy and anal-retentive, those […]
Our Parents Made Us Take These (Scheduling for Telebears, Part V–Pre-Meds)
We saved our last planning update of the week for the group that’s always obsessing and complaining over their GPAs/schedules/academics, the Pre-Med people. We know you people are probably going nutty trying to decide how taking these shitty requirements will make them feel. We know how’d it make us feel. Suicidal. Last time we took […]
Not as Hardcore as EECS, but Hey, at Least We Have Lives (Scheduling for Telebears, Part IV–Engineering)
We go to movies. We club it at times. We still believe in dates. We were nerds in high school and your peers made fun of you for it. Now we’ll make more money than the rest of you losers. Who’s laughing now? We are engineers, baby. Chem 4A Richard Saykally, MWF 10-11, 100 Lewis […]
Why is Scheme so Useless? (Scheduling for Telebears, Part III–EECS)
Programmers begin to be broken down in new ways by Lisp, then recover easily and dominate everything, leaving Cog Sci majors and people who hate programming (me) in the dust, only to be crushed by upper division projects. The EE people grow to hate the sight of computers and are ready to smash them by […]
